Back to the daily grind.

There's nothing like a whole week off from work to lull you into a feeling like work doesn't exist. After an amazing week off from work for spring break, it's back to work in the morning. I feel weary at the thought. It's not that I dislike my job, in fact this work has been a passion of mine for years, it's the simple fact that home tugs at my heart every time I go. Nothing can prepare you for what it feels like to leave your baby. It's like breaking off a piece of my heart and leaving it behind me - and it's even harder now that he is starting to fuss or cry when I walk away. I want nothing more than to stay home and just be Mommy. I am not one of the mothers who need to work to feel fulfilled or maintain my own identity - I am so completely fulfilled by being Mom that I don't want anything more. It is a feeling of defeat knowing that we cannot make that happen and to feel that each day that goes by is another day I am missing with my son. It goes by so fast! I am so thankful that we have been able to avoid daycare and that gives me some comfort, but still - would you want to leave this precious face every morning??

Deep breaths...Tuesday here I come!

9 Months!

Big boy just keeps getting bigger! I've been buying clothes for warmer weather in size 24 month and 2T!! What happened to my tiny little boy! I was not ready for the "t" sizes yet! I think the hardest part of being a mom so far has been watching the days fly by. Each stage of babyhood is so fleeting, it's almost unfair!

"Look - I can feed myself Mom!"

Momma has been tired this month. Work has been difficult and little man hasn't been sleeping well. I sure am missing those good ol' days when Landon was smaller and was such a good sleeper! But I also know that these days won't last forever and some day I will wishing I could get them back, so I try not to dwell on the exhaustion.

Landon is still trying so hard to crawl but can't quite get both of his legs to work together. He sure does figure out how to move though! He scoots, rolls, and twists to get where he wants to go...and he never stops moving! He's really working at pulling himself up too. He pulls up onto his knees now, but can't quite get his feet underneath himself to stand up.

He got to experience grass for the first time during a trip to the park. The weather has been so great lately that we have been trying to take him to park as often as we can. He loves the swings, sitting in the grass, and watching the people.

He seems to be falling more and more in love with dogs too. He just loves them! He laughs at most anything they do - even when he is getting whacked in the face by a tail! It is adorable and makes me feel glad that we have them :)

The biggest thing to happen this month is that Landon has finally cut a tooth! His first tooth on the bottom made its way through the gums and the very top edge is visible. (The top of the second tooth is through now too, but that happened technically in the next month ;) ) Landon is quite the little trooper too - we didn't even know he was teething!

Big man is 8 months!

3/4 of a year! This kid is such a joy to have in our lives!

This month Landon has continued to explore new foods and so far seems to like everything he has tried. He still isn't all that excited about solids in general, he eats about 2 baby food cubes each time we feed solids (once or twice a day). Still no teeth or any signs of teeth, but Mama is a-ok with that ;-P He loves his sippy cup and has mastered the use of one (including banging it on his high chair and throwing it on the floor!)

In January was Landon's first trip to the zoo! Mommy took him with his Grandma and Grandpa Bush and we all had a blast! Landon's favorite animal was the snow leopard. It was so cute that Mommy couldn't resist buying him a stuffed one before we left :)

This boy wants to crawl so bad! He is really trying, but the poor little chunk has so much weight to move that it is really hard! He is getting stronger every day though.

If we stand him up on a toy he can hang on and stand there by himself now. He hasn't tried pulling up on toys yet, but if we hold his hands up just a little he will pull himself up to a stand.

He still adores Daddy's guitar and just loves hanging out with him when he plays. Landon usually tries to get in on the action too and play some tunes himself!

He has a new "face" - we call it the old man face. It makes me laugh every time!

 By far the cutest new thing this month, though, is that he has started lifting his arms to be picked up! It is so stinkin adorable and just melts my heart! <3

Another amazing month with my little guy comes to an end... Where does time go?! Before we know it he is going to be on the move an terrorizing the house. Matt and I really need to get on the baby proofing! :)

I'm 8 months old Y'ALL!!

7 Months!

Wow - 7 months! It officially feels like I have an "older" baby now. Crazy that he is now closer to being one year than he is to his birth! Landon has continued to grow and change throughout the past month; and I still find it pretty extraordinary how much can change in just one month.



The biggest change this month is that Landon is now eating solid food! His first food was avocado - and he wasn't too sure about it. After trying a few more foods and getting used to the texture of solids, he will the gobble the avocado right up! So far he has tried (and loved) avocado, banana, pear, sweet potato, peas, oatmeal, and mangoes. Mommy is loving making all his food and introducing new flavors :)

He babbles up a storm these days! He makes several different sounds, but the ones we hear the most are "yayayaya" and "dadada". Looks like he is more likely to say "dada" first than "mama" although we have heard him babble both sounds at times.

He sits like a pro and loves to sit on the floor and play with his toys. He is becoming more independent with play time so sometimes Mommy and Daddy can get things done while Landon plays on the floor by himself. He's gotten so good at grabbing things - even when it looks like they are too far away!

He is a master of the sippy cup now! We introduced it just before he turned 6 months and he can now use it by himself most of the time. He learned with a sippy cup that has a straw - so now he can use a regular straw too! Mommy shared her water with him the other day...what a big boy!

Can't forget that this month was his first Xmas! Boy oh boy was he a spoiled boy!! The holiday was a whirlwind and very exhausting for all of us, but it was so special to experience his very first Christmas! Landon loved presents and was able to tear at the paper some (although mostly he just tried to eat it). Christmas is such a different experience as a parent - the joy you remember feeling on Xmas morning as a child is the same joy you hope your own child will feel. I cannot wait for the Christmases when he is older and understands the concept.

Here he is with one of his favorite new toys!

To Landon on your 1/2 birthday

Dear Lan man -

Well...here you are at half a year old already! Oh my how time is flying by... I remember when I first found out I was pregnant with you how it felt like your birth was so far away I couldn't even imagine it really happening. When you were born I remember thinking about the 6 month mark and feeling the same way. And here it is. I feel like I will blink my eyes and you will be walking, talking, and going to preschool!

I look down at you tonight, my little 6 month old boy, and still find myself amazed by you. How perfect you are - your tiny little nose, your sleepy eyes, your adorable little mouth with a dribble of milk running down your cheek as you fall asleep on my lap. To me, you are perfect.

Although I miss your tiny newborn days, I am having so much fun watching you grow and learn every day. In your first 6 months of life, you have learned how to do so much! You have learned to smile and laugh. You have learned how to roll over and sit up by yourself. You have learned how to grasp things and how to put anything and everything into your mouth. You have definitely learned how to get your Mommy and Daddy's attention! You are learning how to hold your own bottle and use a sippy cup.

You are growing so fast Mommy can hardly keep up! You're already wearing 12 month clothes and weigh about  21 lbs. This month we had to retire your infant car seat and put you in your big boy carseat. You don't seem to like the big boy car seat as much - but I'm sure you will get used to it.

You are the happiest little baby and are such a joy to me and your dad. Not much makes you cry. You love Daddy's guitar, playing your own little musical instruments, when Mommy and Daddy sing to you, and just about anything else musical. You love bath time and your jumperoo. You love to stand up and you love your binky. You love when people come to visit and you especially love listening to your Grandpa Bush's voice. You laugh at silly voices, funny sounds, people eating crunchy foods - and last night: FEET! Sometimes you will laugh at almost anything.

I am so lucky to be your Mommy. Until you one day have children of your own, you will never understand how truly, deeply, intensely, and unconditionally I love you. I love the way you hold my finger, the way you smile when I come home from work, the way you calm down when I put my hand on your chest. I love when you grab my face and when you touch my cheek softly. I LOVE your laughter - trust me, your Daddy and I do some crazy things to hear that laughter. I love knowing that you are my son.

So, my little peanut, on your 6 month birthday - 1/2 a year!!!!! - although you do not understand this now, you are special and wonderful and amazing. You are smart and handsome. You are perfect. You are loved.

Love,
Mommy

I am thankful!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! This year I feel that I have so many things to be thankful for...

My life is anything but easy. I hardly sleep (not the baby's fault either, it's my back problems!), money is tight since I went to working part time after Landon was born, I never get caught up on the household chores, hardly find time to make dinner, and time for myself? Forget about it! BUT - I wouldn't change it for the world!

I am so thankful this year for my amazing husband! This will be our second Thanksgiving as a married couple, but the first where it really feels like we are MARRIED!! (Last year we were still newlyweds) He is so good to me and works so hard for our family. Most importantly - he is an amazing father. I am SO thankful for that! I adore watching him interact with Landon and watching how Landon's face lights up when he sees his daddy!

I am thankful for our home. We've been here about a year and a half now - the first time we've stayed anywhere longer than a year in the entire time we've known each other! We love our home and we love where we live. Sure, it's starting to feel small as the baby stuff takes over, but I am so thankful that we were able to buy a home and provide a stable place for our son to grow.

I am thankful for my parents. Without them I would not be the person I am today. I am thankful for the way they support me and are always there for me. I am thankful for the way they always offer helpful advice without making me feel pressured to do it that way or making me feel like I am doing it wrong. I am thankful for the example they led for me as parents. I am thankful for the way they respect me as a parent. I am so thankful that I have such awesome parents. I am thankful that we live nearby so that they can babysit - there is nobody I would rather watch my son other than me or Matt!

I am thankful for my little brother and sister! They are an awesome aunt and uncle for Landon and the best brother and sister I could hope for. I wish I could see them more, but I am thankful that they are only as far away as the bay area! I am thankful to get to see them when they visit home too!

I am thankful for my friends! Even though we are distanced by so many miles - we still remain friends. I am thankful for the effort put in by all of them to remain in contact and spend time together despite the distance. We have friends in many different places and I love them all!

I am thankful for all my new amazing mommy friends! Such an amazing network of support that I have gained as I became a mommy. I am so thankful to have found this incredible group of women.

I am thankful for my new job. Although I would rather not work and stay home with my baby - I am thankful that this opportunity came up at the right time. Although I cannot stay home full time as I would love to - I get to work short days and I'm only 10 minutes from home.

Most of all this year I am thankful for my son! I am so lucky that I get to be mommy to this awesome little boy. My life has been so much richer and so much more meaningful since he came into the world! I never could have imagined the love I would feel. I am thankful that he is healthy. I am thankful for successful breastfeeding. I am thankful that he continues to gain weight - although I wouldn't mind if he slowed down just a bit!! I am thankful that he is such a happy boy and that he is such a good sleeper! I am thankful for his snuggles and smiles and laughter. I am thankful for every inch of that precious baby. I am in awe that he is mine. Really the word "thankful" doesn't even capture the way I feel. I don't think there is a word that truly captures it. "Lucky" is the best I can come up with. I feel so darn lucky.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! What are you thankful for? Today is a day for looking past all of the problems in your life and focusing on the good. Life is good. :)

5 month old little monkey!

Okay... I'm a little behind on this one! Being a mommy = less time to get things done, being a working mommy = almost NO time to get things done! Lan Man turned 5 months old on Tuesday! He is getting so big! His 6 month clothes barely fit so he is mostly in 9 month stuff and it's looking like we'll be ready for 12 month any second. We weighed him at home on his 5 month birthday and he is about 20 lbs now! What the heck little man?! His infant seat is soon to be retired. :(

This month has been a big one for milestones! He learned how to roll from his tummy to his back (although he has refused to do it again after showing off the skill about 6 times on the day he learned it). A few weeks after that and he is sitting up completely independently. He will still fall from time to time, but it is rare now and he can sit for 15+ minutes - such a big boy!!

He is playing with toys more now too. We bought him a cute little toy piano and he had a great time banging the keys on that and making music with his daddy.

He loves his jumperoo too, but he hasn't quite figured out the jumping part :)

Landon also had his first Halloween this month! He was the cutest little skunk!

He officially found his feet this month and is working hard at getting them into his mouth!

It continues to amaze me how fast he is growing and changing! It is hard to believe that just 5 months ago this big boy...

was THIS little boy...

 UNTIL NEXT TIME....